WeTalk with... Hulya Erdal on finding your authentic self.
WeTalk with… is a series of interviews with powerful and inspiring women sharing their experience, challenges and lessons.
Hey, I’m Pauline 👋 I’m the founder of WeTalk Community - a community empowering women in hospitality to express their voices. This community was born to give more visibility, space, and opportunities to connect, meet and grow your careers.
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I met Hulya back in February during a panel discussion I organised for International Women’s Day in London. We bonded straight away. I was in awe of her energy, strength and passion for the hospitality industry. Since then, Hulya has been my an unconditional support when I launched WeTalk and if I’m being honest, she has been one of the reason I started this project.
I sat down with her a week ago and we talked about feeling empowered, finding your true self and be authentic in that industry.
Tell us all about you and your journey so far
I started out working indirectly with hospitality as a marketer and PR, representing high profile food companies. After getting married and having two kids, I decided that I’d always wanted to be a chef, and had ideas of working abroad. I desired the flexibility so I could choose when I worked and where, especially with two young children. I also wanted to train as a teacher. So I took an advanced level chef’s course and then went on to do a teacher’s course. This led me to the world of culinary education, as well as setting up my own catering business, and taking on a regular column writing about food for a national newspaper.
Why did you launch The Recipe For Life? What were your main
After two challenging marriages, and at the time, in my mid 40s, going through my second divorce, along with navigating moving home, single parenthood, running my business and peri-menopause, I realised that maybe the universe was trying to tell me something! I decided to take a journey of self-discovery and immerse myself in the search for me. I felt lost and needed to rediscover life and dig deep to reconnect with my happiness.
Fast forward to my mid 50s and life is very different. It was through this journey that I realised I was most definitely not alone in my thoughts of feeling lost. The Recipe For Life was born from these experiences and the stories I’d been told by other midlife women. I found a lot of solace and healing, not only through all the books and courses I took and connections I’d made, but also my cooking.
Spending time in the kitchen helped me heal myself from within, gave me confidence and inspiration. I rediscovered my joy and happiness. I was able to heal from some of my past experiences, release baggage I just didn’t need to carry and start living and enjoying the present, while also planning for a better, more exciting future full of new opportunities. I cooked my way to a more authentic, unapologetic me!
What have you learned when building this community / business?
I think I can break it down like this:
1. That you are never alone. There is always someone with a shared experience, someone you can talk to, someone who is willing to hold your hand and listen.
2. Women are brilliant champions of each other. They will show empathy, care for your wellbeing and rally their friends to support another woman in distress. (known as tend and befriend).
3. That putting yourself first, loving yourself, is an important lesson that we all need to learn. Being self-ish, is NOT a bad thing!
4. Rediscovering your-self and your truth, is a vital part of living more authentically and with unapologetic freedom.
What were your biggest challenges and how have you overcome them?
My biggest challenges have been to let go of old conditioning. I’ve worked hard on managing my own feelings of guilt, often arising as a result of cultural, family and social influences. Learning to understand myself better and to appreciate my-self more, has been profound. Being able to tell myself I love ME, and to let go of the shaming, blaming and guilting that, as women, we are so conditioned to accept, has been hard but the best thing I ever did.
I did a lot of programmes with well known thought leaders and mentors, specifically targeted at rediscovering your SELF, such as Louise Hay’s Mirror Work. Being able to get back in touch with your inner being is the most valuable gift you could ever give yourself. This is why I do the work I do, because I want all women, all non-binary people to feel whole from within, to love their-self and to live with freedom.
What hopes and dreams do you have for women in the hospitality industry?
My dream is that our industry accepts all people, no matter how they choose to identify. I hope that we have equity for everyone, in all areas from job roles to salaries. I would love to see our industry fully embrace wellbeing in the workplace and show care for all their employees, so we promote a healthy, holistic place to work that welcomes everyone and treats everyone with respect. I think the industry could be best in class and show the way for others industries.
Final question that I love to ask to the guests I interview: Any words of support for people who are still to start a career in the industry?
The hospitality sector is such a diverse and vibrant industry, with never a dull moment. Everyday is varied and there are a vast amount of opportunities, for all abilities, and all people. It’s an industry with fast promotional prospects and the chance to work all over the world. The skills you gain in hospitality are hugely transferable across other sectors, you will never regret working in this industry, and the best bit is you get to meet some incredible people. If you’re not sure on your next career move, or a new graduate or college leaver, I’d recommend hospitality.
Whatever your age, whoever you are, Hospitality has a place for you.
More about Hulya
Midlife is often the turning point for countless women to start a new chapter in their lives. Often influenced by a whole range of life altering ingredients such as menopause, empty nesting, divorce, redundancy, and health concerns.
You might hear words like “Authenticity” and the “Unapologetic Self” thrown around like an Italian pizza dough. But what does this all mean for your midlife journey? Is it about changing your life 360 degrees? Or is it time to rediscover your- SELF?
How can you be more authentic and live a life that makes no apology to anyone?
Hulya is a culinary educator and master of self-discovery. Merging the power of cooking and transformative coaching, Hulya guides midlife women on a holistic journey back to their authentic self, so they can live an unapologetic life of freedom!
You can connect with Hulya here:
Web: https://therecipeforlife.com/
Email: hulya@therecipeforlife.com
Book a FREE SELF-DISCOVERY
Call here: https://calendly.com/recipeforlife/30min
Thank you so much Pauline, our conversation was so enlightening. I am so pleased to have met you and to be a part of the We Talk Community!